Fri Feb 22, 2008 11:35 pm
Hello Aunt Wxxx:
Thank you for the heartfelt account of your own experience, and how you feel is necessary in order to be accepted. I empathize with the perceived need and drive to excel for recognition as equals. It is a classic underdog motivation as well as the competitive nature some possess that propel them to greater achievements in light of a challenge. But all too often there are also those who bemoan their fate, deem the gap too great and sell themselves short on what is possible with action and determination.
It is rightful, and even noble, to decry discrimination of the basest forms. However, there is also a danger of allowing ourselves to be polluted in the battle against it. There are certainly outright racism that can not be justified in any way, but I believe that, for the most part, what one feels as discrimination are unintended or even unaware of by the offender. The "privileged" ones by comparison, whether born into or achieved, are no more or less decent than anyone else as a group in general. It is also misleading to paint an "oppressed" group as pure and innocent. In a free society, there is no permanent nor definitive class status across the entire category of relevant discrimination. In any one aspect that defines us, we are considered "above" or "below" that fluid and elusive demarcation. Except for the few luckiest or least fortunate, we are at any given time discriminating AND discriminated by. Where should one's "sympathy" lie between a rich Asian and a poor White? An erudite Black and a blue-collar Asian?
But so often we are only aware of the times we are made to feel inferior (mostly without overt provocation), but blissfully ignorant of what others are thinking and feeling based (fairly or not) by our appearance, demeanor and accoutrement. To this point I say that, on a personal level, it is not others who need to be more aware and sensitive, but ourselves. Especially as a victim of perceived derision, one must guard against the equally infectious sentiments of envy, resentment and anger that, minimally, poisons one's sensibility; but when gathered and fanned by skillful but manipulative persuasion, often lead to destructive blows to a cohesive society in pitting class against class, group against group.
Better it is to channel the energy positively by not wallowing in victim hood, but challenging oneself to be better and more forgiving. And as a society, stop giving handout after handout without expectation, but to re-construct the family unit, instill pride in achievement and education that open doors to opportunities. I have managed apartment units in downtown LA with many tenants mirroring what you described in other areas. It is not because they lack the intelligence or function to do better, but only for growing up rudderless in broken families that only know of the welfare-state benefits, much of which reward (unintended, of course) teenage girls for having more children who never got to know their fathers. It is not oppression they suffer from, but too much tolerance for any behavior that is the root cause for the kids growing up without discipline or values. Their shackle is no longer made of metal or caused by systemic racism, but the decades of good intention showered upon them without responsibility. One can see clearly what happens when a child is spoiled at home who never found the initiative to move out or to make anything of himself. A typical Asian family will never allow that to happen, but when it comes to dealing with inner city problems, somehow that is the overarching solution proposed because it makes one feel good to be charitable. Such is the insidious form of soft discrimination to which money is not the solution, but only through hard-earned pride.
In acknowledging that America is generous and affords more opportunities than anywhere else on earth, why then do you think there are so many out there who are reluctant or even loathe to give her credit? I already conceded that it is far from perfect through my own account of experiencing racism, yet I do not discredit the ideal put forth so long ago in pursuit of liberty, equality (in opportunity and access) and happiness on one's own terms. The great principles America is founded on has not failed -- people have fallen short. And no matter one's disagreement with the leadership, the American flag flies for all of us, conservative or liberal, Asian, Black or White, Rich or poor,...and even for her own citizens dedicated to her demise. When I see the city of Berkeley proposing a ban on military recruiting and burning the American flag, I just have to wonder why their distaste for the Bush administration has to cross into the desecration of institutions that had kept America safe and the symbol of her generosity we all benefit from? If a liberal takes leadership in the White House, does it than make the American flag good and beautiful again, and our soldiers shiny vanguards of liberty once more? If so, these are not vessels of injustice deserving of hatred, but mere innocent instruments hijacked by a disagreeable administration who is the true and only enemy. If not, than what can be more clear in the belief that the blood of each injustice here and abroad from day one of her existence is on the hands of the soldiers, and stains the red stripes on her flag? How can one be proud of America if that is the conviction?
One must not let our personal experience cloud fair judgment. If a minority only measures (or with disproportionate emphasis) a country's greatness on the narrow interest of that particular group in benefit received, and not the breadth of her totality, progression through time nor the highest ideals she uphold, then one's view of America is that of pragmatism, and not altruism for which sacrifice is demanded but rewarded with a heart filled with love and pride. All too many have laid down their bodies for America -- the true patriots who gave the ultimate gift. Do not sully their noble legacy if America is your country. The Universalists shouldn't begrudge someone else more deserving of patriotism, for in denying and denouncing America, his allegiance is as a non-denominational world citizen.
Jim
Thank you for the heartfelt account of your own experience, and how you feel is necessary in order to be accepted. I empathize with the perceived need and drive to excel for recognition as equals. It is a classic underdog motivation as well as the competitive nature some possess that propel them to greater achievements in light of a challenge. But all too often there are also those who bemoan their fate, deem the gap too great and sell themselves short on what is possible with action and determination.
It is rightful, and even noble, to decry discrimination of the basest forms. However, there is also a danger of allowing ourselves to be polluted in the battle against it. There are certainly outright racism that can not be justified in any way, but I believe that, for the most part, what one feels as discrimination are unintended or even unaware of by the offender. The "privileged" ones by comparison, whether born into or achieved, are no more or less decent than anyone else as a group in general. It is also misleading to paint an "oppressed" group as pure and innocent. In a free society, there is no permanent nor definitive class status across the entire category of relevant discrimination. In any one aspect that defines us, we are considered "above" or "below" that fluid and elusive demarcation. Except for the few luckiest or least fortunate, we are at any given time discriminating AND discriminated by. Where should one's "sympathy" lie between a rich Asian and a poor White? An erudite Black and a blue-collar Asian?
But so often we are only aware of the times we are made to feel inferior (mostly without overt provocation), but blissfully ignorant of what others are thinking and feeling based (fairly or not) by our appearance, demeanor and accoutrement. To this point I say that, on a personal level, it is not others who need to be more aware and sensitive, but ourselves. Especially as a victim of perceived derision, one must guard against the equally infectious sentiments of envy, resentment and anger that, minimally, poisons one's sensibility; but when gathered and fanned by skillful but manipulative persuasion, often lead to destructive blows to a cohesive society in pitting class against class, group against group.
Better it is to channel the energy positively by not wallowing in victim hood, but challenging oneself to be better and more forgiving. And as a society, stop giving handout after handout without expectation, but to re-construct the family unit, instill pride in achievement and education that open doors to opportunities. I have managed apartment units in downtown LA with many tenants mirroring what you described in other areas. It is not because they lack the intelligence or function to do better, but only for growing up rudderless in broken families that only know of the welfare-state benefits, much of which reward (unintended, of course) teenage girls for having more children who never got to know their fathers. It is not oppression they suffer from, but too much tolerance for any behavior that is the root cause for the kids growing up without discipline or values. Their shackle is no longer made of metal or caused by systemic racism, but the decades of good intention showered upon them without responsibility. One can see clearly what happens when a child is spoiled at home who never found the initiative to move out or to make anything of himself. A typical Asian family will never allow that to happen, but when it comes to dealing with inner city problems, somehow that is the overarching solution proposed because it makes one feel good to be charitable. Such is the insidious form of soft discrimination to which money is not the solution, but only through hard-earned pride.
In acknowledging that America is generous and affords more opportunities than anywhere else on earth, why then do you think there are so many out there who are reluctant or even loathe to give her credit? I already conceded that it is far from perfect through my own account of experiencing racism, yet I do not discredit the ideal put forth so long ago in pursuit of liberty, equality (in opportunity and access) and happiness on one's own terms. The great principles America is founded on has not failed -- people have fallen short. And no matter one's disagreement with the leadership, the American flag flies for all of us, conservative or liberal, Asian, Black or White, Rich or poor,...and even for her own citizens dedicated to her demise. When I see the city of Berkeley proposing a ban on military recruiting and burning the American flag, I just have to wonder why their distaste for the Bush administration has to cross into the desecration of institutions that had kept America safe and the symbol of her generosity we all benefit from? If a liberal takes leadership in the White House, does it than make the American flag good and beautiful again, and our soldiers shiny vanguards of liberty once more? If so, these are not vessels of injustice deserving of hatred, but mere innocent instruments hijacked by a disagreeable administration who is the true and only enemy. If not, than what can be more clear in the belief that the blood of each injustice here and abroad from day one of her existence is on the hands of the soldiers, and stains the red stripes on her flag? How can one be proud of America if that is the conviction?
One must not let our personal experience cloud fair judgment. If a minority only measures (or with disproportionate emphasis) a country's greatness on the narrow interest of that particular group in benefit received, and not the breadth of her totality, progression through time nor the highest ideals she uphold, then one's view of America is that of pragmatism, and not altruism for which sacrifice is demanded but rewarded with a heart filled with love and pride. All too many have laid down their bodies for America -- the true patriots who gave the ultimate gift. Do not sully their noble legacy if America is your country. The Universalists shouldn't begrudge someone else more deserving of patriotism, for in denying and denouncing America, his allegiance is as a non-denominational world citizen.
Jim
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